


drew&rick | hold me

by goldpeak



Category: The Night Shift (TV 2014)
Genre: Comfort, Crying, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Hugs, Kisses, M/M, Panic Attacks, The Night Shift - Freeform, gays in love, supportive husband
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-13
Updated: 2017-08-13
Packaged: 2018-12-14 18:40:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,127
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11789124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goldpeak/pseuds/goldpeak
Summary: TW // PANIC ATTACKSTears blur Drew’s vision. His fists are clenched, fingernails digging into his palms. He grits his teeth, swallows around the lump threatening to rise in his throat. He breathes in shakily, his breath hitching. His heart is pounding, trying to escape; his throat is closing up, tightening, he can’t breathe-.Drew lurches forward, collapsing into Rick’s arms, causing the latter to stumble backwards a few steps. He buries his face in Rick’s shoulder, body heaving with the difficulty it takes to just draw one breath, his fists clenched in the fabric of Rick’s t-shirt.---“H-Hold me? Just for a bit? I just- I need someone to hold me.”Rick nods. “Okay.”





	drew&rick | hold me

**Author's Note:**

> TRIGGER WARNING: DESCRIPTION OF A PANIC ATTACK.
> 
> If that bothers you, please do not read! I don't want to upset anybody!
> 
> Disclaimer: Obviously, everyone doesn't get the exact same symptoms during a panic attack. At the end of 4.07, in Drew's final flashback of the episode, he has what looks like a panic attack - I say that because the symptoms he exhibited are almost identical to what happens to me when I have them. I used those symptoms in this one-shot, as they're most accurate for what happens to me and what he was exhibiting in that episode.
> 
> 2nd Disclaimer: This is in no way trying to romanticize panic attacks. It's simply a hurt/comfort fic with a supportive, understanding and wholesome relationship demonstrated in the process.

_TW // PANIC ATTACKS_

Tears blur Drew’s vision. His fists are clenched, fingernails digging into his palms. He grits his teeth, swallows around the lump threatening to rise in his throat. He breathes in shakily, his breath hitching. His heart is pounding, trying to escape; his throat is closing up, tightening, he can’t breathe-.

He reaches out, his fingers trembling, and grabs onto the doorknob. He twists it, his hand slipping twice before he finally throws it open. He staggers through the doorway, into the living room. He nudges the door shut behind him.

The house is quiet, peaceful in the dawn light. Too quiet. He can hear his own shaky breathing, his breath catching in his throat, the panting as he tries to just _breathe_.

He makes his way down the hallway, moving slowly, trying to calm his breathing as he walks – he doesn’t want to wake Rick up, no... he’ll get in the shower and get this under control- it’s just a panic attack- he’s fine.

He’s just pushed the door to his and Rick’s bedroom open, his eyes trained on the floor, careful of every step – his breath catches again and he startles, stumbling a step, he can’t breathe- oh, he can’t breathe-.

“Drew?”

He looks up, startled. Freezes where he is, hands trembling, brown eyes full of tears, bottom lip quivering, mouth gasping for air.

Rick’s laid in bed, tangled up in the grey sheets, wearing an old t-shirt and some sweats. His stormy blue eyes are narrowed in confusion. He looks like he’s been up for a while. A cup of coffee sits on the bedside table.

“S-Sor-,” Drew chokes out, but manages nothing more.

He wants to say to Rick that he’s sorry for waking him up, that he’s fine, that he doesn’t want to bother him, but he can’t get anything out and he thinks his throat is closing up even more and oh- he really can’t breathe now– and a tear runs down his cheek. He draws in ragged bursts of air, his mouth open, jaw trembling, panting, nose scrunched up, rapid breathing-.

Rick almost lurches out of bed, already wearing his prosthetic, and crosses the short distance to where Drew’s stood, trembling, heaving.

“Hey, babe,” he says gently, because Drew’s eyes look like those of a crazed animal’s and-.

Drew lurches forward, collapsing into Rick’s arms, causing the latter to stumble backwards a few steps. He buries his face in Rick’s shoulder, body heaving with the difficulty it takes to just draw one breath, his fists clenched in the fabric of Rick’s t-shirt.

Rick knows what’s happening- Drew’s having a panic attack. Whenever he comes back from deployment he gets them fairly often, but Drew hasn’t been deployed for a good while... Rick wonders what triggered this one.

Rick regains his balance, tightens his arms around Drew, one palm on his shoulder blade and the other on the small of his back- holding the man close to him.

“Babe, Drew, you gotta listen to me,” Rick says calmly. “Breathe. You gotta breathe.”

Drew’s breath is still hitching, his mouth still agape as he gasps for breath, he can’t form words- his throat is constricted, he can’t-.

“I’ve got you. Breathe, okay? I’ve got you,” Rick murmurs, his lips pressed close to the side of Drew’s head. “I’ve got you.”

Drew counts in his head, tries to time his breaths, manages to inhale once smoothly – he exhales and hiccups, panic rising back up in his throat. Drew focuses on Rick’s hands on him, his fingertips pressing in. The warmth of his body, the scratch of stubble as Rick slots his head against Drew’s. The rise and fall of Rick’s chest, his steady breathing...

Drew tries to match his breathing to Rick’s, holding it until they’re in tune, then exhaling in one big breath. He inhales choppily, exhales again. Inhales, his breath hitches, exhales. Inhales, exhales. Inhales, hiccups, exhales.

He pants against Rick’s shoulder, aware of his fingers still trebling, his heart still pounding.

Drew doubts he could take a step if he tried, so he doesn’t try. He stands there, trembling, breathless, in Rick’s arms, as he fights back tears and tries to regain control of his body.

A few minutes later, Drew’s finally breathing relatively normally again, and he thinks he can manage a few words. “I-I’m sorry.”

Rick tightens his arms around Drew, tucking his head closer against the other man. “You haven’t done anything wrong. Don’t be sorry. What do you need?”

Drew inhales again- he feels his throat tighten, the tears threaten to return- he exhales. “H-Hold me? Just for a bit? I just- I need someone to hold me.”

Rick nods. “Okay.”

So, they stand there. Drew on unsteady feet, his hands fisted in Rick’s shirt, head tucked into the latter’s shoulder. Rick with his arms tight around Drew, his head pressed against his husband’s, his mouth in a fine line as he contemplates all the ways he’s going to kill the person who caused Drew to have this panic attack.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Rick asks gently.

Drew pulls away gently, releasing Rick’s shirt from the grasp of his hands. He flexes his fingers, gaze trained on the floor, before looking up and locking eyes with Rick.

“Not really,” he says, and his voice is tender and soft and vulnerable and Rick frowns.

“Okay.”

“Thank you,” he murmurs. “Just- thanks.”

Rick nods, moving his hands up to cup either side of Drew’s face. Hesitantly, the latter leans forward, brushing their lips together before their noses bump into each other and Drew ducks his head, a laugh escaping his lips. Rick smiles warmly, chuckling, as his thumb sweeps across Drew’s cheek.

Drew tilts his head up again, and Rick matches his lips to the other man’s. The kiss is quick and soft, but full of love and that’s all Drew needs for his hands to stop quaking and his heart to stop beating a mile a minute.

Rick drops his hands, smoothing them down Drew’s arms, until he’s holding onto the latter’s hands. He squeezes, before looking back up into Drew’s eyes.

“I’m always here for you. Whatever you need. I love you.” Rick’s voice is laden with sincerity; his stormy blue eyes full of adoration as he looks at his husband.

Drew’s cheeks flush pink, he ducks his head- almost as if he’s not used to the idea of someone loving him so unconditionally-. He swallows, looks up with a slight smile and says, “That means more to me than you know... I love you, too.”

A smile blossoms across Rick’s face, he leans in again- Drew meets him halfway this time- and captures his husband’s soft lips in another kiss.

...

 

 


End file.
